You long to look more like Jesus. You pray for more of his heart. You desire to reflect his nature while serving as a missionary.
But the question still remains… How do I actually become more like Christ?
The truth is that all of us are constantly being formed into the image of something. Athletes are shaped by the culture of their locker room. Netflix bingers are molded by the shows they consume.
The same holds true for Christians. Every disciple of Jesus has been formed and continues to be formed. Factors like your family role, hurts and needs, church history, image of God, friendships, and personal experiences with Jesus all play a role. You are currently being sculpted by the culture of your mission field.
For this reason, it comes as no surprise that our growth in Christlikeness is a mixed bag. A significant part of formation is reformation — finding personal healing and growth through God’s reconciling love.
Yet becoming aware of heart areas that miss the mark of Jesus’ fullness might make you feel unsettled. But don’t worry — you can’t force yourself into healthy formation. You won’t become like Jesus by trying harder. The goal isn’t self-improvement, and God isn’t handing out heavenly report cards. So, how does it work?
Spiritual formation is when the human spirit (heart or will) is given definite “form” or “shape” as the Spirit of Jesus molds your inner world to become like his own.
This looks like slowly becoming more like Jesus in your heart and organically expressing his love to God and others. You become the kind of person who naturally does what Jesus would do if he stepped into your life, family, and ministry.
This is because the Spirit of Christ is the pioneer of the spiritual journey — he leads the way, not you (Hebrews 12:2). But you can partner with Jesus to grow in grace through spiritual disciplines.
It might surprise you to learn that Jesus himself practiced spiritual disciplines like solitude, silence, secrecy, soul friendship, Sabbath, and many more (Mark 1:35; John 19:9; Matthew 6:3; Mark 6:31; Luke 4:16). The Bible is clear that the Son of God grew in grace just like me and you
(Luke 2:52). The disciplines made space for him to abide in the Father and be shaped by his love and power.
Similarly, spiritual disciplines don’t earn us grace but instead open us up to grace. The best way to practice the disciplines is to focus on your need for Jesus and then ask him to lead you. This keeps your engagement with him through the disciplines, personal and relational.
Below are some spiritual disciplines to help you get started. You might consider asking the Holy Spirit to draw you to the ones that would be the most fruitful for you in this season.
Disciplines of Abstinence
These are ways of denying yourself something you want or need to cultivate hunger for Jesus and make space for him.
Solitude: Removing yourself from interaction with others to get alone with Jesus and be found by him.
Silence: Finding a quiet place and not speaking to intentionally calm your mind and attune to Jesus’ presence and voice. This can also look like refraining from responding quickly when listening to others to be fully present to them in love.
Fasting: Going without food (or something else like media) to depend on Jesus for comfort and strength.
Sabbath: Setting aside work to rest in Jesus’ presence and provision — choosing to pray and play with him and others over productivity. God designed us to practice Sabbath one day a week, but you can also get started in shorter blocks.
Secrecy: Intentionally not drawing attention to your good deeds to let others receive affirmation, as you find your sufficiency in Christ alone.
Submission: Pausing and choosing not to assert yourself in a situation to come under the authority, wisdom, and power of King Jesus.
Disciplines of Engagement
These are ways of connecting with Jesus and others to receive and share his love more deeply.
Scripture Meditation: Trusting the Spirit-inspired words of Scripture and inviting God to speak to you through the Bible to shape your heart. Practices like Lectio Divina or Breath Prayers help God’s Word get deep in your heart.
Worship: Adoring Abba’s goodness and beauty in music, words, ritual, or silence. This can be done in community or privately.
Prayer: Conversing with the Risen Christ about your heart, journey, relationships, and ministry. Prayer is a relational way to partner with Jesus in all of life as you love God and bless others.
Soul Friendship: Engaging relationships with loving friends where the emphasis is prayerful conversation or spiritual practices.
Personal Reflection: Paying attention to your inner self to grow in love for God, self, and others. The Psalms model how to do this prayerfully with the Spirit’s help.
Service: Serving Jesus by overflowing with his love and compassion to those in need. Tithing is also a powerful way to give of yourself in humility.
Practice the Spiritual Disciplines with Jesus
This list certainly does not include all the spiritual disciplines — it’s just a foundational starting place. Most activities can be spiritual disciplines when your heart is submitted to the Lord. For example, you can get creative and lie in the sun while embracing the warmth of God’s presence and slowly praying, “Those who look to the Lord are radiant” (Psalm 34:5).
Partnering with the Spirit to practice these disciplines (or others) is the rhythm of formation that Jesus models for us. It’s how we train in godliness as his apprentices and rely on him to form us in Christlikeness instead of trying hard in our own strength (2 Peter 3:18).
So, do you desire to grow in the grace of King Jesus through the disciplines? Here are a few steps you can take:
First, there are a few books that can help you identify the spiritual disciplines that are customized for you and your journey. My book Your Best Life in Jesus’ Easy Yoke walks you through disciplines that will help you find grace for your specific stress point. Healthy Feelings, Thriving Faith maps out the most formational and fruitful practices for your unique personality type.
You could also come on retreat with Soul Shepherding. This is the best way to learn about spiritual formation and the spiritual disciplines in greater depth. You’ll be empowered to practice these soul-nourishing disciplines each day and then experience the blessing of talking through your experience with other ministry soul friends who understand your journey.
Praying the Good Shepherd meets you personally and powerfully through the spiritual disciplines.
