There I was again, back in Dallas, Texas after spending the previous 11-months on a missions assignment in Paris, France. Don’t get me wrong, I love Texas and the United States, but my heart was burning to be back in France where I knew God had called me to be. Honestly I was frustrated and a little depressed about starting the whole, find lodging, job-hunting, visa application and fundraising process all over again. This process was becoming all too familiar. After all, this was going to be my fourth time in 4 years!
Many of us have probably been in a similar place in life. We think we’ve finally made it into our calling and purpose only to lose all control. The next 8 months would become one of the hardest seasons of my life. Not because I had to temporarily leave the ministry I was involved in, and not even because my girlfriend was 5000 miles away. This would be hard because of the battle raging inside… learning to trust God and fully surrender my future to Him.
I felt God direct me to leave the organization I was with previously. It meant leaving the security I had always known and stepping into unknown territory. I began questioning God’s direction and my doubts kept me in a holding pattern for 3 months.
During that time, I couldn’t find a steady job, and spent all my savings on rent and food. One day, I came to the breaking point and went to an evening worship service hoping to hear from God. During the worship time, God started wrecking me and He gave me a vision. I was walking through a forest and came upon a huge lake. At my right was a small empty canoe. Looking at it, I knew I needed to cross the lake but didn’t know how. Then suddenly a figure dressed in white approached me, stretched out his arm and handed me a boat paddle. Without a word, I took the paddle, got into the canoe, and started crossing the lake. While I was crossing, I heard a strong but soft voice tell me, “I will provide what you need to cross the ocean back to France. Don’t worry, I got you.” I broke down hard and started surrendering my trust and insecurities to God.
The next couple months were difficult but I was learning to trust God to open the right doors. In March, my French worship band, “Horizon Louange,” called me about an exciting and busy summer schedule. To join them, I needed to be in Paris before the 9th of May. In April, I heard about Modern Day and really felt God leading me to join their missions non-profit. So I joined their team and started the visa process. I contacted the French Consulate for an appointment, but they informed me that there were no open slots before June. Unless someone cancelled their appointment it would be impossible for me to fly out in time. So I gathered all the necessary paperwork and started checking their website daily hoping for a miracle.
A whole month passed without any change, but I decided to believe God. On April 29th, an appointment opened up for the 1st of May! Tuesday, I drove to the consulate and applied. I was told it was impossible to get a visa before the 7th of May, but I kept hope. I needed to receive my visa by Friday so I could leave Monday for Paris! Thursday when 5:30 p.m. rolled around with no indication that my visa had been sent, leaving Monday looked impossible.
I decided to worship God anyway and 5 minutes later I received an email stating that my visa had been sent and would arrive Friday morning! I lost it. I had decided to trust God in an impossible situation and He had come through! This past summer our worship band got to play for TBN Israel, had an album launch concert, recorded songs in Italian, lead worship in Rome at a youth conference, and went on a worship tour in the South of France.
Even if your situation truly seems impossible, trust God through the process! His timing is perfect and He wants us to know that He is the one holding the strings.
